this first part of this answer is a general comment, and not directed toward the asker...
i am a sibling of an autistic person. i am also his legal guardian, so i know first hand the struggle raising a disabled child can be. and i'm 100% IN FAVOR of vaccination. i have had both of my children vaccinated and will have my baby due next june vacciated. my children are 16 and 2. so if any of them should have been affected, it would have been my 16 y.o. son, who has a blood relative with autism AND received vaccines prior to the "mercury" brouhaha.
my son has had, the MMR, HepB, HIB, polio, DTap, Hep A, Menimune, influenza... my daughter has had all except MMR (she's scheduled), Menimune (too young) and Hep A.
my kids are NOT autistic. nor are they vectors for vaccine-preventable infections.
preservatives that are purported to be neurotoxins, are also found in our everyday products (household cleaners, waxes, nail polish, et al), yet we are not overly concerned about that. also, the levels of these preservatives in vaccines are miniscule, and have not been shown to be a link to autism.
now, this IS directed towards the asker:
i know how difficult it is to see your little ones sick. after every shot, my babes had fevers, soreness and were cranky. the reason--as i'm sure you've been told--has NOTHING to do with the preservatives in the vaccine; yet the baby's immune response to the viral particles (which cannot cause disease) in the vaccine. all i ask is that you really educate yourself on the benefits of vaccinations, and the potential risks to your child if they are not vaccinated. unvaccinated children not only are at risk; but children who are too young or too sick for the vaccines are at risk if the number of vaccinated kids in the population drops... there have been recent outbreaks of polio, measles and pertussis primarily due to non-vaccinated kids.
check out the CDC's website on vaccines for more information.
http://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/
good luck...
oh...and to those who feel it necessary to not vaccinate your kids as a result of some crack-pot research, please let parents know so that you are not invited to the play-yard!!!