co-sleeping with baby?

Question

I am a first time mother of a 3 week old baby girl. I'm breastfeeding and plan to breastfeed until 5 months or so. My question is what is everyone's say and advice about co-sleeping? Is it safe? Does it increase the risk of SIDS? Do you recommend co-sleeping? Is it a good idea or bad idea? I tend to fall asleep while nursing my baby during the night, and sometimes i let her sleep longer with me cause i'm so tired. I don't want my daughter to end up wanting to sleep with me all the time, and not sleep in her bassinet. I have the bassinet right next to my bed, so its not too far, but i just don't want her to get too use to being in my bed and not sleep in hers. That's my main fear along with SIDS of course

Answer 1

It's a personal decision you have to make. I have a 5 month old. She currently sleeps in her bassinet next to our bed, but will be moving into her "big girl crib" within the next week. She normally falls asleep in bed with my hubbs and I, then we move her into her bassinet. There have been a few times that she has slept in bed with us. I personally prefer her to sleep in her own bed. I find that I sleep better when she isn't in bed with us. I wake up too much worrying about my hubbs and I rolling over on her.

I also don't want her to get used to sleeping with us every night to the point that she won't sleep in her own bed. I know too many people (including myself when I was little) that slept with their parents till they were like 7y/o. There's no way I want that!

I'd suggest maybe letting her nap with you in bed, and maybe even let her fall asleep with you in bed. But then move her to her bassinet.

Answer 2

I'll tell you - my pediatrician is totally against bed sharing. She told me I would kill my child if I did it. So, for almost a month I didn't sleep because my daughter would not sleep anywhere by herself no matter what we did. I even have a co-sleeper that butts up to my bed and she could be inches away from me with me touching her, and she will have none of it. My doctor told me I should just let her cry in her bed until she fell asleep and I thought that was the most cruel thing I had ever heard - especially for a 1 week old baby. So, my husband started saying we should put her in bed with us - I didn't want to because of all the doctor had said. I finally gave in and we are *all* happier now, and we are all getting some much needed sleep! My sister had the same problem and did the same thing and didn't have a problem transitioning her son to his own crib and room at 6 months. We plan to do the same.



In my experience, I am very tuned in to my daughter when she is sleeping with me, so I wake up sooner and get her fed sooner than if she wasn't right in bed with me. Plus, I wake up if she farts wrong, so I think I feel safer that she is ok now! =P

Answer 3

I can't recommend co-sleeping enough. It's so much easier for breastfeeding, everyone sleeps better and it reduces the chance of SIDS in fact - they think SIDS could be caused by baby getting too hot or forgetting to breathe. By sleeping next to you, they are regulated to your body temperature and your breathing so neither of these are an issue. Plus you can know within seconds if something is wrong. My daughter is 10 months and we've co-slept from birth, she sleeps with her arm over me now (so cute!) and i wake to her beautiful smiles. It just seems so much more natural to me than putting a baby to sleep alone when they're biologically programmed to want to be close to you.

Answer 4

While breastfeeding, you are very attuned to your baby. Cosleeping is safe, provided you are not a smoker and do not drink or take sleep meds. Make sure you're creating a safe bed environment, too.



Safe co-sleeping (with some studies about the benefits thereof!):

http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/safe.html

http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/cosleeping.asp



http://drbenkim.com/articles-attachment-parenting.html



Cosleeping reduces SIDS:

http://www.babyreference.com/Cosleeping&SIDSFactSheet.htm



And I know that you stated a goal of five months, but if you breastfeed for a year, you'll never need to buy formula. The AAP recommends a minimum of one year, the WHO and AAFP recommend two. Keep an open mind. It gets much easier as time goes on.

Answer 5

I did the same thing as you (falling asleep with my daughter) Try to stop as soon as you can!! I now have a 6 month old that will not sleep by herself or her crib! Every time I go to lay her down she wakes up and cries and just won't sleep anywhere but next to me. I know it's hard to leave your baby in a crib/bassinet and you're constantly wondering if they are still breathing, but chances are you baby is fine. SIDS does happen, but not too often. Get your baby on a routine and get her sleeping on her own, or else later you'll be like me and go crazy every night sleeping with a 6 month old haha

Answer 6

Co-sleeping includes bed-sharing, room-sharing, and using things like co-sleepers and baby hammocks with baby close to mom. Technically what you are asking about is bed-sharing. Its important to make the distinction.



It is universally accepted that roomsharing is safe and reduces the risks of SIDS. However its not all that practical for a breastfeeding mother because you will fall asleep nursing -nature has designed it that way. Also unrestricted access to the breasts at night has been shown to increase breastfeeding success among other things.



Many studies also show that SAFE bedsharing reduces SIDS risks, among other risks. Unsafe bedsharing or worse sleeping with a baby on a couch, chair, or unsafe location is definitly unsafe. It is unsafe to bedshare with an infant if any of the occupants of the bed are unaware that the baby is there (ie placing baby in bed with an already sleeping parent) or do not agree to take responsibility for the baby. It is also to unsafe to bedshare if the person is morbidly obese, suffers from a sleep disorder that prevents waking, or takes medications that cause drowsiness. You should also not bedshare if you smoke, drink alcohol, or use recreational drugs. Persons too young (toddlers, preschoolersl, etc) to take responsibility should also not co-sleep with an infant. The sleep surface must also be baby proofed.



As to how hard it will be to transition a baby to solitary sleep that depends on many factors including when you decide to make the change and the temperament of the baby. Also keep in mind that whether or not a baby has every bedshared once they are out of their crib they are more than likely going to want to sleep with mommy and daddy. Also an infant used to solitary sleep can at any time start to refuse to sleep alone or in their crib even if you have never bedshared.



Baby already instinctively wants to and needs to sleep with you. Babies do rely on mom to regulate their temperture, breathing, and heart-rate. Just because they *can* sleep alone doesn't mean they should.



The bottom line is that safe bedsharing probably reduces the risks of SIDS more than room sharing and is certainly safer than solitary sleep. Unsafe sleep arrangements are unsafe.



Do not borrow trouble. Do what works right now, change it when it doesn't work. Afterall some day you will want your baby to use the toilet but right now you use diapers. One day your child will feed themselves, but you can't force a baby to feed themselves. One day your baby will be able to tell you what she wants in clear english, but for now she can't. Enjoy each stage and deal with each stage.









Why babies should never sleep alone: A review

of the co-sleeping controversy in relation to SIDS,

bedsharing and breast feeding

http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/articles/McKenna_why%20babies%20should%20n.pdf



CO-SLEEPING: YES, NO, SOMETIMES?

http://askdrsears.com/html/7/T071000.asp





Need vs. Habit

http://www.naturalchild.org/tine_thevenin/need_vs_habit.html



Sleeping through the Night

http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detsleepthrough.html



Studies on normal infant sleep

http://kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/sleepstudies.html

Answer 7

I did the same thing. I had a c-section, then an infection, so it was difficult to get up and down out of the bed, and my husband slept like a log and never heard the baby. We bought this thing that you put in the bed for the baby to sleep in. I can't remember what it was called, sorry. But it was to prevent you rolling on the baby or her falling out of bed. It was like a "mini-bassinet" for the bed. It came in quite handy. Many people will tell you not to do it, but it is really up to you. You have to do what works for you and your daughter. Good luck!

Answer 8

The physiological effects of sleep-sharing are finally being studied in sleep laboratories that are set up to mimic, as much as possible, the home bedroom. Over the past few years, nearly a million dollars of government research money has been devoted to sleep-sharing research. These studies have all been done on mothers and infants ranging from two to five months in age. Here are the preliminary findings based on mother-infant pairs studied in the sleep-sharing arrangement versus the solitary-sleeping arrangement (Elias 1986, McKenna 1993, Fleming 1994; Mosko 1994):



1.Sleep-sharing pairs showed more synchronous arousals than when sleeping separately. When one member of the pair stirred, coughed, or changed sleeping stages, the other member also changed, often without awakening.



2.Each member of the pair tended to often, but not always, be in the same stage of sleep for longer periods if they slept together.



3.Sleep-sharing babies spent less time in each cycle of deep sleep. Lest mothers worry they will get less deep sleep; preliminary studies showed that sleep-sharing mothers didn't get less total deep sleep.



4.Sleep-sharing infants aroused more often and spent more time breastfeeding than solitary sleepers, yet the sleep-sharing mothers did not report awakening more frequently.



5.Sleep-sharing infants tended to sleep more often on their backs or sides and less often on their tummies, a factor that could itself lower the SIDS risk.



6.A lot of mutual touch and interaction occurs between the sleep-sharers. What one does affects the nighttime behavior of the other.



Even though these studies are being conducted in sleep laboratories instead of the natural home environment, it's likely that within a few years enough mother-infant pairs will be studied to scientifically validate what insightful mothers have long known: something good and healthful occurs when mothers and babies share sleep.



http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T071000.asp#T071003

Answer 9

We had a great experience co sleeping with my son - he is 3 now and has been in his own bed for a couple of years. The transition required a little effort and we didnt do it cold turkey but worked him up to full nights on his own. I am now co-sleeping with my baby gorl of 4 months. It really helped me nurse on demand and ment baby and myself were able to fall back to sleep quickly as we were never fully awake. I usually put baby down for sleep in bassinet first thing at night but when they woke the first time I brought them in with me. If you do co-sleep it is important to make sure there are not lots of loose heavy blankets near baby and make sure that you and your partner have not been drinking heavily - this make you sleep more heavily and are less aware of where baby is and risk suffocation.

Answer 10

I have a 4 week old boy and i too am breastfeeding, and currently we are co-sleeping. It is so much easier that way because i'm breastfeeding. I think it is fine for now, but i wouldn't let it last much longer. I have to keep telling myself that aswell. Good Luck

Answer 11

If you want to put your baby to sleep in 20 seconds you must get the "Instant Baby Sleep" MP3 sound track. Here is their official web-site: http://www.instantbabysleep.net



The sound track gently produces energy over the full human hearing spectrum with an embedded pulse that gently eases the brain to the Alpha state well known for drowsiness and sleep induction.

Answer 12

At approximately 3 months he started out having some nights the place he slept for the period of the nighttime. he's rather much 4 months now and on common wakes a million to 2 situations to feed, extra if he's having a foul nighttime. each and every as quickly as and a whilst he will sleep for the period of the finished nighttime nevertheless, supplies me a coronary heart attack each and every time!

Answer 13

Great desicion of Breastfeeding your child! The best gift you can give her.

Co-Spleeping is very good for you, your baby and the breastfeeding process.

"Studies have shown that co-sleeping with a breastfeeding infant promotes bonding, regulates the mother and baby's sleep patterns, plays a role in helping the mother to become more responsive to her baby's cues, and gives both the mother and baby needed rest. The co-sleeping environment also assists mothers in the continuation of breastfeeding on demand, an important step in maintaining the mother's milk supply."http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/faq.html

Contrary to popular opinion, cosleeping actually helps babies become independent. Meredith Small, anthropologist and author of Our Babies Ourselves, says,



"For millions of years, the normal sleeping position of human infants has been on their backs nestled next to mother. Only in western cultures do we force babies to sleep alone, thinking they are more safe and independent placed in a crib with no contact. But history, and how most babies sleep in other cultures, suggests that the West is out of step with what is best physically and emotionally for our children."



Check this article of La Leche League, a nonprofit organization for helping breastfeeding mothers.

http://www.llli.org/FAQ/cosleep.html

Answer 14

MY OBGYN recommends co-sleeping. She has 4 children and all have slept in the bed with her, she said it's much easier to nurse, as well as check the safety of the baby, make sure they are breathing, etc. She told me that I should co-sleep with my son when he is born...

Just thought I'd pass that on...

Answer 15

It's perfectly safe as long as you keep the sleeping area safe. Keep blankets and pillows away. Mom's don't roll over on there own baby but dads do. When she gets to the rolling age that will also be a risk so get some bed rails. I co-sleep with my son. He naps in his crib during the day and sleeps in our bed at night. I nurse him then scoot away from him when I manage to stay awake. I don't want him getting used to feeling me at night. I tried putting him in his crib at night and he did fine with it but still wakes every 2hrs at night and I just found it too exhausting. We got a twin mattress and pushed it up to our bed. Our mattress is on the floor. I nurse him on the twin bed then roll to my queen bed with my husband.



It works well for us.

Answer 16

i did the cosleeping for 2 months. its comforting because you can wake up and see your baby and know she's okay. you have instincts so the chances are small to roll over on your baby. babies sleep better next to mama and daddy. if you're breastfeeding its very convenient because you don't have to get up at all. i formula fed and i kept a bottle of cool boiled water , her baby bottle, and the formula can beside the bed and it was also very convenient.

Answer 17

Proper co-sleeping significantly reduces the risk of SIDS.



Make sure you remove all excess bedding from the bed. One pillow per adult (and keep them away from baby's head). Baby is safest between mom & bedrail (you can find them for $25 at any baby stores), not mom & dad.



Your breathing will keep her breathing in a pattern. If she gets cold, your breasts can (and probably will) rise a few degrees to help warm her up.



If co-sleeping works for you, then do it! :)

Answer 18

not only is it safe it is great for your baby! I just read this article the other day. enjoy! I am a mother of 2 currently co-sleeping abd nursing a 9 month old ittle girl.



http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/T131000.asp

Answer 19

a healthy nursing mother has never smothered her baby through co sleeping - FACT. it does not increase SIDS, it actually helps to reduce it. we co sleep, 1 year later my daughter is doing great and a brilliant sleeper.



http://www.babycentre.co.uk/baby/sleep/cosleepingsafely/





Nichola - Mummy to 11mos old Sophie xxx

Answer 20

Co-sleeping reduces the risk of SIDS. As long as the baby is in a crib in the same room and not in bed with u. Our baby is 4 months old and we plan to keep him in our room (in a crib). He is our fourth, and I did that with all my kiddos. They all slept fine and transistioned fine in their own room after a yr old.

Answer 21

if you dont want her to become used to sleeping with you i would not cosleep unless absolutely necessary....

thats just my thoughts on it

my baby takes one or two naps with me in the day but always sleeps in her crib... i dont even want the chance of her thinking bed times in moms bed even at 8 weeks



oh and im not saying its unsafe, i just chose not to.... i rather like having my room as my own, thats about the only place i get quiet time with the husband

Answer 22

No, No and No.. It is unsafe to sleep with a baby in the bed. I know she is 3 weeks, but soon she will be rolling over and OFF the bed. You might roll on her. SHe will want to sleep with you all the time , you need to start habits NOW. I would put her in the bassinet next to you. Don't do that too long though maybe a few more weeks. Then move her to her room and keep a monitor on. I would never rock mine to sleep either, they get use to that and will never learn to sleep on thier own.

My kids are teens and happy and healthy and always had a good sense of self esteem. I love my kids, but lines do need to be drawn also.

Especially if your married, that bed is for the two of you. How can you possibly have relations with children in the bed? I never understood that.

Answer 23

well first off, yes it is a bad idea. Not recommended.

SIDS and co-sleeping go hand in hand.

PLEASE TRY to not fall asleep while breastfeeding! You could very well smother you're own child. Also, you're baby could choke on your breast milk and well, you are sleeping and not able to help. This is SUCH a bad idea. Yes, new mother's are tired, but there are things you just cannot do.

If you're main fear is SIDS, do none of the things you mentioned. Nothing and no one can prevent SIDS, but there are things you can do to not edge them along.

Answer 24

co sleeping is bad don't do it anything can happen once you fall asleep and not know it.